Asses

It's true. Photo courtesy of the lovely and gracious Mia M.

MSNBC goes to the Denver titty bar

Rumor has it that the marquee now reads "DNC thanks for nothing". I'm awaiting confirmation on that.

Big sky, country.

I have been in Montana for most of the summer, as it turns out, and the Wayward household is moving out here for the fall and winter. It's just too nice to leave. I like the club, I like the city, I have found a nice routine here, and we're lucky enough to be very mobile. I've found an apartment and will be hauling some things out here from Portland next month.

Weirdly, this is the first time I've actually relocated because of a better work environment. I have one friend who's moved at least four times to settle for months in a city where she enjoyed working, and I have traveled a lot over the past two years, hitting more clubs in that time period than I had in the previous ten years.

I think this means I might be able to deduct the moving expenses as well, though I'm not sure if that holds true for independent contractors. Also, I'm scared to learn to drive in the snow. Portland doesn't get it, Ohio did, and I didn't even try to learn there, just stayed put.

This is the kind of town that people visit and dream of moving to; it inspires those fantasies of settling down and enjoying the sleepy college town life. Probably just like Austin did in, oh, 1987. Don't look for me fly fishing or anything, but I'll probably attempt to take some more serious skiing lessons this winter.

strippersontheroad.com is live!

My friend and occasional co-worker Tara has done something really wonderful and thoughtful for all of us who travel frequently. She's created strippersontheroad.com, a strip club review site geared towards dancers. It's already amassed a good collection of detailed information on clubs from Alaska to Florida and all points in between. I hope all of my dancer readers will head over there and review their clubs. You don't have to give it all away, but even the most basic information (is it contact or not? topless or nude? 18 and over or 21 and over? blue collar or upscale?) is so helpful.

Thank you, Tara! You get a stripper gold star on both nipples for this one.

Me, getting ready to dance for a guy, getting him to sit down.

"What's your name, hon? I'm Susan."
"That's my mom's name!"
"Well, you can call me Bubbles if it's gonna be weird for you."
"No. If you fucked like her, that'd be weird!"

I literally fell to the floor laughing.

Only someone not from Texas finds this surprising

But oh, it's still so funny. From AMERICAblog:

TX Congressman Pete Sessions fundraising at Forty Deuce.

Another reason why the Texas pole tax was ultimately doomed.

I'd love to hear from dancers in Denver and Minneapolis once the conventions are in full swing. Both cities have some great clubs, but I imagine male escorts occupy what's potentially the most lucrative sector of the sex industry in Minneapolis.

Audience of bikers? Better play to the crowd

The Hell's Angels were in town last week. Overall, they were pretty uninteresting as customers as none of them were active dance or VIP buyers. 90% of them hung out, drank and socialized with each other in the bar. Of the remaining 10%, 9% were decent stage tippers, and 1% were actively annoying.

That 1% is represented in the above article -- literally. Wearing the same plaid shorts in the photo that he had on Friday night, this dude was the single most annoying customer in the bar all weekend. He was bouncing off the walls, hanging off a the railing that separates the stageside pit seating from the elevated seating area, and at one point actually attempted to walk on to the stage while a dancer was at the front, blissfully unaware of his brief presence. I feel for the band he forcibly sat in with; I mean, they didn't have bouncers or anything.